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Getting Back to Your Life After Suffering a Loss


Bereavement Relief

Posted On: Jan 11, 2017

Getting Back to Your Life After Suffering a Loss

Life stops after a loss. It's not uncommon to stop caring about almost everything. Certainly, you stop caring about yourself. The things that once brought you joy still leave you numb. Things that once excited you leave you indifferent. The whole world is grey. Everyday tasks, such as taking a shower or getting dressed, are suddenly too much. This period of grief isn't unlike a bout of depression—and in a very real way, it is depression, albeit a situational type. Finding the motivation to resume your life looms like an impossible task, but it's not—difficult, yes, and often painful, but not impossible. It may still take a while before the pleasure comes back to your life, but going through the motions is actually helpful.

Create a Schedule for Yourself

Knowing what comes next can help you take the first step every morning. After a loss, you're not just dealing with a lack of energy and a penetrating sadness. There's also the fear that comes along with any death, the realization that it can strike at any time. Leaving the safety of your sadness is scary. So, write out a schedule for yourself. It can double as a to-do list, which gives you a sense of purpose. Make it as detailed or as small as you like. Wake up, eat breakfast, take a shower, brush your teeth, pick up the mail. These are small goals, but sometimes small steps are best.

Do One Thing You Love Every Day

What types of things bring you pleasure? It doesn't have to be a huge task. Do you enjoy cooking? Are you a reader? Do you love petting your dog? Make a cake, watch an episode of your favorite show, read a chapter of your new book—do something that brings you pleasure, even if it's just a small amount for now.

Get Out of the House

The urge to isolate yourself is understandable, even necessary at the very beginning of this process. Grief is a solitary process sometimes, after all. As time passes, however, the desire to keep yourself hidden verges on unhealthy. You have to get outside. For one thing, it's good for you—even in the winter, being in the sun does wonderful things to your mind and body. For another thing, the more you put yourself out in the world, the easier it becomes and the more you'll enjoy it.

These are simple activities, but they will help you resume your life after suffering through a loss. How did you take up the reigns of your life after losing someone?